Thursday, May 2, 2013

The Birth Story: At the Hospital

I'm doing this whole story in parts, so if you want to read about how I got to the hospital, go here.

Getting back to the hospital was pretty uneventful. I was pretty apprehensive — I must admit. You see, it's not like the movies at all. Garrett wasn't speeding dangerously while I yelled out angry and threatening words in the back seat. We didn't get rushed into Labor and Delivery with me getting pushed in a wheelchair. I wasn't sweating profusely and screaming obscenities.
This hat was so small. We had to take a pic.

In fact, I felt pretty good. And that made me pretty nervous. I did not want to get sent home.

Just as we were about to close the elevator doors to head up to L&D another couple came waddling in. Garrett held the elevator for probably forever so that they could make the trip with us. We subsequently let them go ahead of us to check in.

This probably added another 5 minutes to our trek. (As I said before, remember these things.)

I was certain at this point that no one would believe I was actually in labor. Let's be honest, I looked like I'd come to the hospital for one of their Oreo and blackberry shakes, not to have a baby. Even worse, I was pretty sure I hadn't felt a contraction since we left home

To make matters worse again, when they checked me I was only one centimeter dilated. I'd been one centimeter for the past three weeks. This was not going over well.

Our check began at 11:30 p.m. In other words, I had until 12:30 a.m. to progress or else I had to go home. Let me tell you — this was not a fun hour. My contractions hurt quite a bit. I guess I'm kind of a pansy.

About 40 minutes into this whole ordeal I was certain my water had broken. We called the nurse and had her check. It hadn't.

After this I took a moment to go to the bathroom. Without my knowledge, Garrett asked the nurse if I had progressed at all.

"Well, I didn't really check, but no," she said bluntly.

Even though I didn't know this little fact, I spent the next five minutes in tears because I was sure they were going to send us home and I was in enough pain that I didn't know what I was going to do.

Remember all those extra minutes we added to our trip that I told you to remember? We're officially on borrowed time right now.

15 minutes later the nurse came in to see if I had progressed at all.

Success! I was a two.

Now, let's do that math. Priesthood blessing + letting other couple go ahead of us = 15 minutes.

Without those precious 15 minutes, I would have been sent home.

This is when it gets exciting. Okay, not really. It actually gets gloriously boring. You see, they gave me an epidural. With all due respect to those who choose to go without meds, I'd like to tell you that epidurals are the best invention ever. I felt nothing. Nothing. Garrett and I would watch the contractions on the monitor and be like, "Woah, that's the biggest one you've had yet!" and I would be blissfully happy.

With that in mind, I slept as I progressed from a 1 to a 7. How awesome is that?

I had been progressing about one centimeter an hour since 12:30 that morning, but when I hit 7 at around 10:00 on the morning of the 25th it's like something connected. In another hour I'd made it to a 10.

... to be continued...

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